after all this time?

 After a very long time I'm writing on this blog and I have to say I never saw that much of cringe as in my 5 years old posts. 

Dang, how much can one change during 5 years? I think a lot, if they wants. Or if it's super necessary because of circumstances. 

A lot of shits and bullshits happened with me from my last post on here. Some of them were nicer, some of them were not nice. 
Lots of changes occured. 

One of changes, big changes, which were happening during the time is, that I went greatly enthusiastic about UFC. Which is fighting organization, for those who might come across this tale and wouldn't know. Or you know what, find it on a Google.

I was always excited about combats, whether it was historical battling with cold weapons, or martial arts where your weapon is your own body, or shooting guns or archery or crossbow. 
Unfortunately, if you're daughter of losers, you will never be raised to achieve anything in your life, unless you're brave enough to fuck up. Which I wasn't at all. And if I by a chance tried to be brave and fuck up, it backfired big time. Always. 

Anyway.

So, why the shit, my blog was on freeze for so long, and why it will be again after posting this crap?
Because, my lads, every time I start with something, I lose my energy and elan and my cat will start wailing and my focus goes off and blah.
Which is what's happening right now. Without the cat thing. I got fuckingly tired and all my energy and ideas and shits are flooding away from me. Why? I don't know exactly. I might have some clues but, I don't know. 

I have a lot of to say and express my ass about a lot of things but I just can't. 
Technically, I can. Practically, I cannot. 

So, let me just say my regards and maybe once in future good bye. 


R.